Feeling Guilty
More on Quality of Life
My post last week on quality of life was not intended to be controversial. But I was chastised by one Facebook commenter that “Quality of life of a country cannot be measured on an expat point of view…quality of life should be based on the life of the people living and working there on local terms, on local salaries and how much quality they can have after paying their taxes and bills.”
Guilt
I get his point. The “average Portuguese” salary was €1,871/month before taxes in 2017 (this is the most current data I can find). This is less than what we are paying for rent. And when one factor in taxes, which we are shielded from for ten years (due to NHR), the disparity becomes even larger.
Given that, I am not without guilt. In fact, Denise would tell you that at times I feel too much guilt over the oddest things. It was shortly after we moved here that I posited the question, “Do you sometimes feel guilty?” It was actually a two-part question:
Did she feel guilty that we had more money than the “average Portuguese” and
Did she feel guilty that we had run from a country we felt was failing, rather than staying and trying to fix it?
She knew from my question that I did. She gave me one of “those looks” and simply said, “No, why are you feeling guilty over something you can’t control?”
But to be Fair
I have read and re-read my original post as well as the comments from the expat friends that I contacted asking for assistance, and no one mentioned the fact that we are now “rich” in our new country. Instead, there were a few common themes:
Food
“Portuguese vinho!”
“I was never really a foodie, but I love the fresh fruits and vegetables here.”
In the States “we had concerns about how our environment was impacting our physical health. Chemicals in our food. GMO's. We ate a lot of bad stuff that was approved by our FDA and promoted by Big Ag.”
Walkability and Public Transportation
“We are able to walk to meet our friends in town and even though I own a car it just sits there for most of the week…I just had a party on my roof and everyone walked.”
“I love being able to walk just about anywhere…not just for the sake of walking but to actually get where we want to go…the nearby restaurants, stores, banks, pharmacies.”
“A public transportation system that is economical and works.”
Public Spaces
“I love walking in the evenings and seeing people sitting on benches in the park.”
“I love the town squares and parks to hang out in.”
“When there are events in the city square you’ll see Grandma and the grandkids dance to the music…teens love the babies.”
Slower Pace of Life
“I love the slower pace of life…I enjoy relaxing with my partner in the morning over a cup of coffee before I start my workday.”
“It feels like there is actually time to conquer your to-do list.”
“Part of the charm is that it’s lost in space…so much less stressful, except for the driving.”
Safety
“We feel incredibly safe, not just from crime and violence, but also from predatory companies and a complicit government. We see city employees washing the garbage collection bins and sweeping the gutters along the street. We have a sense that there is deliberate social engineering that is done for our welfare.”
“Personal safety and low crime rate.”
“In Portugal, we enjoy safety and security.”
What Money Can’t Buy
The final comment above, “In Portugal, we enjoy safety and security”, was made by our new South African friend. Since the exchange rate between the South African Rand and the Euro is particularly unfavorable, she is not a “rich” expat. She took time to explain to me her Portuguese wage, the large house and garden she left behind, and the mortgage on a smaller home she now must pay. But she ended by saying, “Nothing compares to feeling safe and not having to constantly look over your shoulder… ”
We are fortunate. We are white and lived in safe, privileged, communities. I never thought I might be robbed or attacked on the street. Though there were (and are) many more gun deaths and mass shootings in the States…somehow I never felt threatened. Though I try, I can’t fully realize how she feels. I just am happy she has found peace in Portugal. And I don’t feel guilty about that.
Thanks for another excellent, thought-provoking post, Nancy. I have to disagree with the person who suggested that quality of life can only be measured by the people who live in a place. It sounds like he or she was suggesting that only the natives' point of view matters. But as immigrants, we are now living here, experiencing our own realities, and making personal assessments of quality of life. And yes, our reality may be very different from persons who were born and raised here - but in our home countries our situations were also different from others around us. So I think quality of life has be considered from an individual perspective (what's important to me) and from a societal perspective (what do we all enjoy or benefit from). And for those of us new to the country, I think we have an obligation to find ways to contribute to the society. Meus dois cêntimos.
Yes it is safe, but like anywhere else in the world you have to be careful to where you walk through, specially at night because you can bump into a druggie and be robbed.
He will probably only take your money or car but not harm you.
It is a poor country and people struggle but Portuguese people are mainly friendly, accommodating and like to help.
And why should you feel guilty for having more than some? You didn’t rob it. You worked to have it and you probably had more opportunities than others.
And yes, with all the cons, Portugal has a great quality of life. Difficult to find alike in other countries. I wouldn’t live anywhere else.